Midnight Express Kenya

Immigration offices, Mombassa, Kenya:  A dilapidated stone structure which atmospherically, and architecturally, resembled Dr. Goebbels' interrogation chamber, and was the site of our subsequent interview on criminal charges.

Thick morning air is cut by the putrid stench of idling Kenyan bureaucrats, a hot musk wafts about the nostrils of these five disconcerted and glassy-eyed teachers. Half-conscious government types stir with a purposeful fervor upon the sight of discomfited foreigners and an ample opportunity to exercise limited authority while operating under the guise of autocratic madmen, giddied by red tape and governmental rhetoric.  More so, this mazungu encounter would shake the previous month of grinding tediousness and an atrophying routine of nothingness.

The chief Kenyan immigration officer filed our stumbling selves into his stuffy office, while we, parched, and silent, were charged with entering the country illegally and not having proper visa certification, and would thus be tried by court and prosecuted to the full extent of the law.  Images of dank prison cells and squatting holes flashed before me, condemned to years of suffering and mistreatment.  My malicious intentions and illegal charity work were to blame. Treated like thieves and murderers alike, we stood about in nervous laughter, desperately looking for a nicotine fix - this smoky release would ease our nerves.  Seemingly, a discreet exchange of monies and a weighty stack of devalued shillings sufficed to right our legal wrongdoings.  (Or a private chat on the part of our Kenyan NGO coordinator)

We were then subsequently cleared of all charges and encouraged to return to our teaching project.  Before doing so, we indulged in oversized slices of fudge cake and exaggerated bottles of tusker beer,  which eased our frayed nerves.  While I didn't have a Billy Hayes experience, complete with scantily clad chests splayed across a viewing glass or routine Turkish beatings, I nonetheless had heart palpitations worthy of midnight express: Kenya.